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Place your bets: Finally, the Timbers have come back… to Jeld-Wen

15 September 2011 2,646 views 24 Comments

Last week the only winning move was not to play.  The Timbers couldn’t score and Marcelin didn’t get subbed in, so the house cleaned up.  There will be a new bet this week, allowing you to bet against the Timbers.  I don’t recommend it unless you want to have bad luck all week though, it’s like betting the Don’t Pass Line in craps.

Advice from the Gambling Insider

The Gambling Insider has been following the twitters and sent us these tips:

The Lines

Who will score against the Revolution?

Jewsbury 7:2
Perlaza 5:1
Cooper 6:1
Dike 10:1
Zizzo 12:1
Nagbe 13:1
Chara 15:1
Alhassan 18:1
Defense 5:1
Field 12:1

Side Bets

Timbers held scoreless: pays 3:1 and some really bad mojo
Timbers score on a set piece, pays 4:1
Bathroom wait at half-time, over 3 minutes, pays 3:1  (I will use a random restroom in the North end and if it takes me 3+ minutes to get a stall or urinal, you win.)
Bathroom wait at half-time, under 2 minutes, pays 3:2
Timbers score in the 45′ or the 90′, pays 20:1

The Rules

-Everyone gets $20 in monopoly money each week.  Anyone can jump in at any time.
-If you are carrying a balance, you get your balance plus $20.
-Leave your bets in the comments.


Quite a few people got cleaned out last week.  Holly went from princess to pauper.  Ken and Kejsare stayed near the top by holding on to most of their money.

Ken $55 ($75 available to bet)
Kejsare $55 ($75 available)
Clifford $20 ($40 available)
paulsepp $20 ($40)
Tim $15 ($35)
jmparker94 $30 ($50)
TheMikeDonovan $15 ($35)
CharonPDX $15 ($35)
Lucas $15 ($35)
Holly $5 ($25)
Yax $5 ($25)





Posted by Dan


  • Dan (author) said:

    I’m gonna go with the insider and put $18 on Kalif (got cleaned out last week) and $2 on scoring in the 45′ or 90′

    I won’t bet on the urinals to keep everything on the up & up.

  • Holly said:

    10 on Dike
    5 on Defense
    5 on Field
    5 on bathroom line being over 3 minutes.

  • BigMark said:

    Defense 10.00
    Perlaza 9.00
    Timbers score in the 45′ or the 90′ 1.00

  • Jeff said:

    $5 on Nagbe
    $5 on Dike
    $5 on Defense
    $3 on Fiels
    $1 on Side Bet of LESS than 3 minutes

    Leaving me a balance of $1 lol

  • Hrimvile said:

    Who will score against the Revolution?

    Zizzo 12:1 $3
    Chara 15:1 $5
    Alhassan 18:1 $5
    Defense 5:1 $2

    Side Bets

    Timbers score on a set piece, pays 4:1 $5

  • Clifford said:

    Jewsbury $4
    Perlaza $4
    Cooper $3
    Dike $2
    Zizzo $1
    Nagbe $1
    Chara $1
    Alhassan $2
    Defense $4
    Field $3

    Side Bets

    Timbers score on a set piece, pays $4
    Bathroom wait at half-time, over 3 minutes, pays $2
    Timbers score in the 45′ or the 90′, pays $1

  • Dan (author) said:

    @n0ble0g has $10 on Kalif and $10 on goal in 45′ or 90′

  • Andrew Wheeler said:

    All in for Alhassan!

    $20 – Alhassan

  • Alex said:

    Ok so I got:

    $5 on Perlaza
    $5 on Jewsbury
    $5 on Chara

    And $5 stays in the bank for a rainy day.

  • Yax said:

    $4 Cooper
    $4 Perlaza
    $4 Defence
    $2 Bathroom line under 2 minutes
    $2 Bathroom line over 3 minutes

  • Aric said:

    This looks like fun. So I got:

    $4 on Jewsbury
    $4 on Cooper
    $4 on Defense
    $3 on Alhassan
    $1 on Zizzo
    $2 on Bathroom wait over 3 minutes
    $2 on Goal in the 45′ or 90′

  • AugustePDX said:

    $10 on Defense
    $3 on Nagbe
    $2 on the over for urinals
    $2 on Dike
    $3 on Khalif

  • Greener said:

    Lettin’ it ride on KFC again!

    $19.00 on Kenny Cooper
    $1.00 on goal in 45th minute

  • Dan (author) said:

    To clear things up, the 45′ or 90′ side bet means you are betting on both. So basically any extra time goal will count.

    @themikedonovan has $5 on Kalif, $5 on Chara, $5 on Nagbe and $5 on 45′/90′ side bet

  • Dan (author) said:

    @DemonJuice has $20 on a Kenny Cooper hat trick. Pays 250:1

  • Paul Sepp said:

    $5 Cooper Hat trick
    $5 Jewsbury
    $10 Defense

  • Eezadore said:

    Brilliant! Can I place the full monty an own goal off the board?

    If not, I’ll take a ten spot on the D scoring.

    Fiver on the over potty time.

    Fiver for goal at the 90.

  • Dan (author) said:

    You can bet on “the field”, which includes own goals. I’ll put you down for that.

  • J-P Voilleque said:

    $20 on Alhassan again. HOW CAN I LOSE?!

  • Kejsare said:

    $5 on Field
    $5 on Cooper
    $10 on Dike
    $5 on 2 mins or less wait

  • Andrew Wheeler said:

    The Alhassan assist’s gotta count for something. right?

  • Dan (author) said:

    Bathroom wait time was 9:32, I even took a screen shot, so the over definitely wins. The line was out to the middle of the concourse (near 105). Full results soon.

  • Dan (author) said:

    @Andrew Nope, the assist didn’t pay out, but I’ll give you a line for that next game.

    House didn’t do so hot this week, things might have to tighten up next match.

    The following bets paid out:
    Cooper 6:1
    Nagbe 13:1
    Chara 15:1
    Bathroom wait at half-time, over 3 minutes, pays 3:1

    @themikedonovan $155
    Greener (let’s see if he lets this one ride) $114
    Hrimville $75
    Kejsare $80
    Alex $75
    Jeff $66
    Clifford (this guy likes to make me do lots of math) $60
    Ken $55
    AugustePDX $45
    Yax (who wisely bet the over and under on the bathrooms) $39
    Aric $30
    jmparker94 $30
    CharonPDX $15
    Holly $15
    Tim $15

  • Jeff said:

    Sweet! I’m up to $66! Looking forward to Wednesday’s line. Will there also be a line for Thursday’s US Womens friendly?

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